the line of scrimmage

I lined up with the ball. Every play had become the most
important play on my life. Everything was riding on this game.
I couldn't see anything else except for the outcome of this
moment. I won everything. Or I lost everything. When I was
at the other end of the ball, I never feared it, I always
wanted it. I was used to it, it was natural. But this was
different. I felt unsure, but still, I needed it. I had to do
it. There was no one else. I dropped back to pass on first
down and ran out left, I ran out of space and time and threw to
my left to my team mate. The throw was poor and the ball was
dropped. I felt fortunate and shook it off. Second down I
returned to a similar play this time it looked better, I threw
to my left to the same man, and it was batted away by the
defender. The weight of the game became heavier. I needed a
completion or a touchdown. Now. I dropped straight back and
found the same man I had thrown to twice open, I laced the ball
into his fingers, and he dropped it. I let turned and let out a
scream. I knew I couldn't let the odds fall to our defense
again. This had to be it. I became more nervous. My heart
pounded. I could feel my arm turn to jelly. I knew the rush
would come, I knew the defense would be firm. I allowed my men
to settle, and I dropped back.

The rush didn't come immediately for they feared my
feet, they would make me beat them with my arm. I rolled out
to my left as I had every down looking for the same man over
and over again. Three times I had thrown it to him and failed.
I reached the left out of bounds line and found no one. I fell
back looking for a man to throw to. The defender closed on me.

I made a move back and began to run to my right. I ran across
the field. And there he was, the same man I had thrown to
three times made his move as well, and we ran parallel twenty
five yards apart. I stretched my arm back as he came to a stop
just before the edge of the endzone, and I let it go.

There was nothing else but the ball cutting its way through the
cold air. I felt time stop as the ball reached its midway
point between the two of us, then restart as the ball found its
way into his chest, and secure. For the win.

I sprinted down the field, screaming joy the whole way. I
didnt see anyone but the secured ball floating in the endzone.
I bathed in the moment with my teammates, and it may have been
the greatest feeling ever.

Yet, as I climbed into the car, I found myself alone. And
alone. And I the victory soon faded. The moment I had put
everything into, the acheivement I had weighted in gold, was
all but gone, because was my heart.