as the days grow closer, i think of seeing her again, and all my wits are about me. I can feel her draw more and more near. I feel nervous, excited. I feel ready. I feel love.

the hardest part is the not knowing. Not knowing where she is, what shes thinking. She and her heart could be anywhere, any place. Its hard just to have faith. To give everything up, and just hope for the best, hope things will turn out like you think they should.

Shes not reading this, but maybe its for me as much as it is for anyone else. Maybe its for love as much as it is for anything else. Maybe its bigger than her and I. Maybe this is still for young love. Maybe this is hope, dreams, happiness and all of their counterparts. Maybe its for the world whether they know it or not.

sometimes someone else has said it better, I'll speak through them,

Everything's so blurry
and everyone's so fake
and everybody's empty
and everything is so messed up
pre-occupied without you
I cannot live at all
My whole world surrounds you
I stumble then I crawl

You could be my someone
you could be my scene
you know that i'll protect you
from all of the obscene
I wonder what you're doing
imagine where you are
there's oceans in between us
but that's not very far

Its two thirty in the morning. and love doesnt sleep.

It's not easy. Sitting there and taking the words meant to tear you down. Meant to stop you. Knowing everyone wants you to fail. Everyone thinks its better if you fail. Trying to make her believe that youre meant to be. Its hard to pick yourself up, and try and help the same person up who is the one who keeps pushing you down. Sometimes you just have to close your eyes and believe.

Dear Cavite,

May the new year bring you love as warm as the weathers on your shores. May the new year bring you the beautiful breeze all the way from the western world where Mr. West whispers loving words to the wind for your heart to behold. Happy new year.